Fetish Model Life Partner

The biblical strategy for choosing a fetish model life partner
is to seek Jesus in prayer.
You just need to be ready for His direction.
You must abide in Him.
Then again it may be easier
if you could find a dolphin with a foot fetish,
and make him into Jesus’s personal sex slave.
Then again, this begs a question:
what would the Jesus I know do,
when confronted by Fetish Model Life Partner Jesus?
Would he fight him?
Then again, "anyone who tries to make a distinction
between education and entertainment
doesn't know the first thing about either" —
Marshall MacLuhan.
Then again, all I want is to be Jesus
at the Fetish Model Easter Party.
First I'm laid out on a pink marble slab,
with only a wisp of loincloth about me,
and then my fetish model life partner,
who is Jesus,
and sounds like a flock of geese passing gas over Brooklyn,
chokes me until I begin to worship football equipment.
Then he helps me with my pig training.
I am the writer/fetish model/cultural historian wife
of Marilyn Manson.
I am sinewy with an elk fetish hole cover
and the restlessness of Adlai Stevenson
who carried on a messy pussy blowjob affair
with farm animals despite pubic lice.
I am Corn, the famous Italian fetish model,
a 5 ' 10 " metal vocalist/student-goth,
with long dark blonde hair and blue green eyes .
Im curvy and told that Im very pretty.
Fetish model pretty I guess . . .
but whatever.
I heard that Fetish Model Life Partner Jesus
had a dream girl for several thousand years
and a tampon fetish.
Does that make him a filthy commie?
I sincerely hope not.

(from Annoying Diabetic Bitch, forthcoming from Combo Books, fall 2007)